How to Prepare for Anal Sex
Sexual exploration is always a bit nerve wracking, especially when it comes to trying anal for the first time. There is a certain taboo around the subject that makes it especially hard for women to ask for advice and get their friends opinions, which does not make it any easier.
Anal sex, much like other forms of intercourse, does not have to be as bad as it sounds. It is a way to become closer with your partner and fulfill desires that they or you might have. It is okay to be nervous and shy about the subject, but just be open with your partner about your concerns.
1. Be ready physically and mentally
Preparing for anal is just as much mental as it is physical. You might worry about hygiene matters. This is a natural concern, and solved by a thorough shower, paying special attention to your anus. Also, it is a good idea to make sure that you have not just gone to the bathroom or will have to go soon. Having a clean area is a good starting point.
2. Talk to your partner
Discuss things with your partner and make sure you feel comfortable with him. If you are worried about discomfort, make sure you know that he will be gentle and stop if you need him to. It might be a good idea to have some sort of safe word, so that he can tell you really want to stop.
For the first time, a gentleness is needed. You and your partner should experiment with something a bit smaller, like a finger or a toy. This will give you an idea of how you react and what it will feel like. It is an easy way to ease into it.
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3. Invest in a high quality lubricant
Another way to prepare is to purchase a high quality lubricant. You can always rely on using your own natural lubrication, however, investing in a quality lube can make the process easier. Just make sure you do not get one that has added effects like tingling or warming.
Also, use the lubricant sparingly, adding more as you need it. Going overboard on the lubrication can make the experience messy and lead you to be self-conscious, distracting you from enjoying the experience. If you worry about a possible mess, keep a towel handy or lay one beneath you.
4. Choose the most comfortable position
Anal can be accomplished in most positions that you are able to have sex in, however there are some positions that make it easier. Laying on your stomach is a good choice because your partner can massage your back and shoulders to help you relax.
Sitting on your partner’s lap is another comfortable starting position because it helps to make you feel safe in his arms and allows for a gentleness, giving you more control over the speed and strengths of the thrust.
Finally, lying on your side with him behind you can be very comfortable too. Be wary of doggie style for your first time, as it can be very difficult to hold yourself up at times. Once you have more experience and feel comfortable, you can move on to other positions.
Just like having sex, trying anal for the first time can be awkward and uncomfortable. Do not let this upset you. It is something new and, much like losing your virginity, you need to learn and practice.
Having a trusting and compassionate partner makes the experience easier. He should be able to help calm your nerves. Slowly working up to it and taking your time and being gentle will make the process as easy on you as it can be. Just remember, it is okay to be nervous however do not let that nervousness ruin the experience.