5 Habits of Exceptionally Positive People
You could say, such people must be from another planet – or you have never seen them, only read about them. They wake up in a bliss of picturing a productive day at work they love, then greet their reflection in a mirror with a compliment on how great they look today (and believe it is so!) They are probably lucky to have great partners and comfortable places to live in and work at, so no wonder there are no clouds of worries or negative thoughts in the bright sky of their mind.
Positive people then probably focus on meditation or yoga, instead of having to get kids ready for school, iron clothes or clean the mess in the kitchen. They write positive phrases on their walls, or decorate them with motivational posters, pictures and collages featuring their dreams. By repeating the phrases and contemplating the pictures or collages every day, such people welcome these dream changes into their life – and they totally must be from another planet, if it works for them. You or your friends may have tried the same, but didn’t have any great results. The reality is certainly more complex.
1. Negative to alternative
While many assume positive people are somehow immune to negative thoughts, worries and stress, or capable of avoiding these altogether, they really aren’t – but that’s where another myth is born. It is even often turned into general advice: positive people deal with their negative thoughts by reversing these and convincing themselves of the opposite (I can’t = I can), so you need to do the same if you want to increase your positivity. It’s that simple – if only it wasn’t anything but. If you can’t dance, saying “I can dance” doesn’t make you a great dancer, no matter how many times you repeat that. Maybe some practice does – but that’s a different thing.
Thoughts are like a plan, or a map of where you might get, if you put some effort and action into that, of course. It is fun to imagine positive thoughts functioning similar to a time machine, taking you wherever you wish, or bringing something/somebody into your life without any steps of your own needed to get closer to your dreams. If only they worked like that but thoughts are only a start, just like looking at a map can be the beginning of a journey. Likewise, simply trying to deny or ignore negative thoughts won’t help much when they produce negative habits or behavior. So, if it isn’t possible to avoid doubts and negative thoughts, while just re-wording them is not effective, what works for positive people that could also work for you? Finding alternatives does.
Read also – 6 Ways to Feel Happy and Peaceful Every Morning
2. Work it out or walk it out
This is an example of a great habit and a great alternative. We all know we need regular exercise, we are aware of its benefits, or risks of not exercising. While gym or yoga enthusiasts are worth admiring, most of us find a variety of reasons or excuses why we can’t go to the gym, and can’t exercise at home or go running in the nearby park either. Perhaps there’s even no gym or park nearby, but you can probably find a place and some time for walking. To combat another bunch of reasons or excuses why it isn’t perfect, regard this as a unique opportunity.
As long as the world doesn’t yet resemble futuristic movies where all commute is restricted to shuttles, you can always find a place to walk, if all other attempts of exercising fail. Walking allows you to take a break from what is stressing you out, calm down, “reset” your mind, mood or specific emotions. Working out helps you to do the same, but a “walk out” is a good alternative.
3. Don’t care about what others do or have
One of the testaments of all happy individuals, “compare not” is actually mother to two great habits of positive people: finding a reasonable alternative (you don’t have to do everything exactly like the others do), and being grateful for what you have. Human beings often tend to overestimate either quantity, or quality, or both – but if the grass is always greener elsewhere, happiness or anything positive may only be a brief moment before you think of something “greener”.
The fact that someone has a bigger or better version of something, a bigger quantity or variety of it, doesn’t mean it serves that person adequately or is a source of comfort and enjoyment. Less may simply mean “better tailored to your needs or interests”, easier to use, having time to enjoy it and to relax instead of always hunting for more. “One size fits all”, a bad joke of mass production, rarely fits anybody at all, so know your own criteria and beware of trading them for anybody else’s.
4. Prioritize and do less
“Do less” may sound controversial – but it doesn’t mean “procrastinate and lie on the couch.” It is obvious to most people that being not satisfied with “anything less than perfect” leaves little chances to be happy. Being not satisfied with doing less than your maximum has the same result. It seems cool to “make the most out of your time” now that it is regarded as such a valuable resource. However, if you fail to find time for your family or doing something that you enjoy, you are not making the most important things out of it. Focus on your priorities, and don’t overload your daily to-do list so that you end up being only halfway through when already dropping down from fatigue. Reduce your consumption or shopping, information intake, listening to others complaining, Internet browsing, watching violent movies or TV shows, and other sources of unnecessary stress.
Read also – 4 Lessons to Learn from the Minimalists
5. Seek positive company
Also stay away from negative people – some are never willing to change, you know. Say no to those who are full of gloom and doom, or blame others and waste your time on gossip. There will always be people pointing out some problems in your life, or trying to put theirs on your mind. You may try handling this politely, but you can also make it clear you’re having none of that, if it happens often. People need solutions instead of chewing on their problems (or anybody else’s), so unless they can offer or accept good advice, and take action to initiate changes, it’s no use repeatedly voicing the problems. Surround yourself with happy events and fun, positive people.
Look for the good things around and appreciate what you have or what makes you special. Give yourself credit not for doing more, but for doing something well. There’s nothing supernatural about positive people or what they do, so becoming one of them isn’t like packing your bags for outer space. You can make your personal world better with small positive changes.